dreams and lack thereof

i always feel dumb not knowing what to write for a new post. i think people must get bored if i just write about daily happenings, but then if i were to share all the deep churning thoughts that swarm thru my head i'd come across as unstable. like who of y'all really care that i jump in the pool at least once (sometimes up to three times) a day to prevent heat exhaustion? or does it fascinate anyone that i got a white-trash pedicure with palm tree doodles painted on my toes? and then i feel too light-hearted and young to freely share with the internet world that i'm frightened by the fact that i have no clue where my life is going or where i'll be this time next year. how is it that i don't know what i want? i've always been so focused and driven, accomplishing the goals i've had thus far. but now that i've done so much of what i've wanted to do....what do i want to do now? i want to want something - not just settling for what's available or something "better" if i were faced with two options. not just going back to school because i don't know what else to do. i have lots of life long dreams. but say i finally do have the $ to go for a hot air balloon ride or sail around the world for a year - then what? where do you get life long dreams if you haven't dreamed anything yet?